| in tha HOOOD they be sayin' JOELY YOU HOT |
[06 Mar 2003|06:32am] |
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In da club - fiddy cent >:O |
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Okay so I'm really nervous about this. I'm not gonna say what, 'cause I'm sure most of you know, and if you don't know you're not supposed too. Mmk.
When I first found out, I was scared as hell. I couldn't even form words. And then, as soon as it sunk in and started making sense, I was somewhat fine with it. I was scared still... but who wouldn't be? This kinda thing can change your life. It DOES change your life.
Now I'm just nervous. If .. if it's going to happen, what if I'm not good enough? I can barely take care of myself. Seriously, you'd be suprised how much I depend on Benji, Kelly & my friends and shit. But then .. what if it doesn't happen? What if it's all just a false alarm? I don't know why, but.. part of me doesn't want that. I think. It's confusing. I mean, I'm gonna be 24 in 5 days, I need to grow up. I need to be challenged.. 'cause I know it won't be easy. And I love Kelly. So much. And it excites me that something like this could be possible. I don't know, I'm not making sense. I don't know what I want, but quite frankly, it doesn't matter what I want. Whatever happens, happens.
Whatever happens has to be OK with me... just because. It's not like I can change it, you know? I've come to the conclusion that I shouldn't be nervous. I really think that my love for Kelly is so strong, that together we could do anything. Love is a powerful thing.
Hmm so. We have some interview bullshit at 7AM. Who the fuck is actually AWAKE that early? >:O So yeah, I'm gonna get ready and shit. Holler.
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| SO BORED |
[06 Mar 2003|08:19pm] |
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OK GO |
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I love Kelly and OOPS not you. :P
MY BIRTHDAY IS IN 5 DAYS.
BLURTY GOT NEW MOOD THINGS. HOW FUCKING COOL.
( IVE NEVER FELT THIS WAY BEEEEEEEFORE. )
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